The Gas Man Cometh - Flanders and Swann
- 'Twas on a Monday morning the gas man came to call.
- The gas tap wouldn't turn - I wasn't getting gas at all.
- He tore out all the skirting boards to try and find the main
- And I had to call a carpenter to put them back again.
- Oh, it all makes work for the working man to do.
- 'Twas on a Tuesday morning the carpenter came round.
- He hammered and he chiselled and he said:
- "Look what I've found: your joists are full of dry rot
- But I'll put them all to rights".
- Then he nailed right through a cable and out went all the lights!
- Oh, it all makes work for the working man to do.
- 'Twas on a Wednesday morning the electrician came.
- He called me Mr. Sanderson, which isn't quite the name.
- He couldn't reach the fuse box without standing on the bin
- And his foot went through a window so I called the glazier in.
- Oh, it all makes work for the working man to do.
- 'Twas on a Thursday morning the glazier came round
- With his blow torch and his putty and his merry glazier's song.
- He put another pane in - it took no time at all
- But I had to get a painter in to come and paint the wall.
- Oh, it all makes work for the working man to do.
- 'Twas on a Friday morning the painter made a start.
- With undercoats and overcoats he painted every part:
- Every nook and every cranny - but I found when he was gone
- He'd painted over the gas tap and I couldn't turn it on!
- Oh, it all makes work for the working man to do.
- On Saturday and Sunday they do no work at all;
- So 'twas on a Monday morning that the gasman came to call...
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